TIME CAT - THE MOTION PICTURE EVENT OF THE YEAR

The world has never seen a motion picture like Time Cat. A rollercoaster of a film from beginning to end, with pulse-pounding action, belly-laugh comedy, and moments of pathos so touching you'll near-as-damn-it expire through crying so much.

Time Cat starts out as an ordinary cat who wanders into a government temporal displacement R&D facility. An explosion occurs and the cat is catapulted through time and given strange time-travelling powers. He becomes the world’s first chronofelinenaut.

On his adventures he encounters...

Terrifying Enemies

• Killer Clouds – clouds that fly around in groups and strafe people like fighter planes, shooting out bullets and rockets and that.

• Robo-Monkeys – crazed android simians armed with guns with two settings – one that shoots lasers, and one that shoots bananas.

• Killer Laptops – sentient evil computers who pose as normal computers and then bite your head off. They like going round in groups too and snapping people to bits.

Faithful Allies

• Mind Dog – a three-legged dachsund dog with terrifyingly powerful mental capabilities. Born a mutant, Mind Dog can read your thoughts, make you do stuff, and telekinetically control the environment around him. Unfortunately his mental powers are at the expense of his general physical health, meaning he's constantly coughing, and he can't bark without vomiting.

Evil Nemesis

• Bad Cat – another cat was in the government temporal displacement R&D facility during the explosion, but this was a bad cat who hates Time Cat because he thinks he got better powers.

Cool Things That Time Cat's Got

• One of his cool things he’s got is the chronocopter which can travel through time and battle stuff.

Press Reaction

"I watched this movie in awe, and left the theatre 'feline' fine."
Bazza Yankowitz

"Reight film."
The Barnsley Trumpet

"Even better than Crab-Dog and Sex Baby."
The (West) Finchley Informanator

"Just go and see it, dickhead. For fuck's sake."
Asian Amputee BBW Digest

"Cat-tastic."
Poinsettia World